Week 20 yes the spirit of me is me!

20:1 The spirit of me is me. I can desire to be something else, a bird perhaps, I can emulate someone else and want to be like them, but I can never be them. I can only be me, I can improve me. I can improve myself to the highest degree but that will not make me someone else. The spirit of me is me, that is necessarily fixed.
20:2 I can read and learn a thousand techniques for harnessing the minds power but id I don’t practice the use of the techniques. They will be of no value
20:3 My magic wand of power is my consciousness and my thoughts are carried on the ether as messages from the invisable world formulating the conditions and enviornments of my objective reality.
20:4 Oh the wonderment to know that it has finally been realized that thinking is our business and the joy to have found direction and a way to direct my superfluous thoughts.

When I read these lessons I imagine that haanell is speaking directly to me therefor I must sit and think on them to put them into my own words so they can be internalized by my consciousness. But lets skip on down to 9 as I write this I am picking out the passages that were the high points to the message I received during these readings.
20:9 States unequivocally that it is the sitting silence with the visualization and the imagination that is the absolute for making changes in your reality.
20:14 Shows us a way to get inspired to believe by simply making a small change refered to as getting off the beated path , taking the long way home . Instead of complaining about the traffic take a road less traveled it may be longer by it can give you a better outlook on things. perhaps you come across a field of flowers that you didn’t know was there and now you can’t wait to tell your family when you get home about your new discovery.. and that leads to more pleasant dinner conversation and look at how much brighter your world is now! One little innocuous change in routine
20:18 tells us how to cultivate that inspiration in the silence and what we must possess in order to be ready to receive the inspiration vital for our purpose. So if we are not able to still our minds and relax our bodies and regulate our breathing, we are not yet ready to receive the information from the divine.. Sometimes I have made the mistake of thinking that some information I have received in a sit has been divine inspiration when in fact it has been nothing more than thought fragments whirling around in an overly tired mind. I think we all have experienced that….it’s usually followed by…Seemed like a good I dea at the time….lol
20: 20 through 20:26 talks about the art of refining our breathing with intention to increase our supply of life, energy and vitality. and as I read each paragraph a visual popped into my head of Plate 27 in the Bhagavad-Gita entitled The process of Creation conducted by LORD KRISHNA ‘S VISNU expansions. Here depicted is LORD KRISHNA laying back on the ether, breathing it in and breathing out new glorious worlds through his conch shell, Pancajanya.
20 :27 through 20:30 serve as a warning to be carefull of the consequences of forcefully misdirected thought. Because no matter what the intention, you reap what you sow. an hopefully we are all sowing seeds of peace love and happiness for all of the world,
Inagine yourself floating on the ether breathing it in and breathing out peace and contentment!
Hare Krishna



Week 19 Fears? What fears ? We don’t need no stinking fears

WOW welcome to week 19
So week 19 no webinar I should have been able to catch up then but I was too busy feaking out over the fact that I had had a poor turnout for a show.  So yes I take responsibility  for being so far behind in my blogs, I am my own worst critic I know this this but that is what pushes me Because  even though I am my own worst critic I never down grade myself for a poor show or turnout. I take responsibility for it so I can improve. what ever needs for to be improved upon. Even though I am natures greatest miracle….  Im not perfect’ and will not allow a circumstance to steal my power…Master key 19 is all about the harmful affect of fear on the body and not allowing your power to be stolen from you by that fear. I was certainly being tested these past weeks. My fear…shudder, shudder, shudder…is/was.( we are still progressing)..public speaking and performing alone. but you know I should not be fearful of these things, I have done these things in the past…it has just been a while. I was very tempted to relinquish my power to fear my last performance and it was really funny because  I didn’t have a very large turnout  and because of the layout of the venue   we people sit at the bar , they are basically in another room, So it was quite  challenge to capture people’s attention  when you are in another room. SO… we had a battle going on… yep I’m one of those … my inner me,  my future me did battle with my outer me… Inner me saying stay calm this is only a performance in the development stage after all and my outer me saying Wow well that’ s two hours of my life I can get back! This entire battle took place in a matter of seconds right on stage and the battle ended in a tie because it was just practice after all and with the two hours it took to set up it was really 4 hours I wasn’t getting back…..lol The difference between the me now and the me then is I can laugh and write about  the situation now without thought of oh what will they think…because I am learning to be able to transmute my fear and worry into a platform for forging a new stronger reality.
Haanel says in 19:1717. You may know that thought constantly, eternally is taking form, is forever seeking expression, or you may not, but the fact remains that if your thought is powerful, constructive, and positive, this will be plainly evident in the state of your health, your business and your environment; if your thought is weak, critical, destructive and negative generally, it will manifest in your body as fear, worry and nervousness, in your finance as conditions in your

That pretty much sums up how I feel about myself. because I feel my power I am healthy and happy. And it shows,

Week 18 What a marvelous life this is!


So I really didn’t think I would actually make it this far through this course. Because I wanted to take a couple classes at the city college but I wondered where I would find the time to fit taking a class and time to do my home work into my life with all the other responsibilities that I have going on in my life. I’m not complaining, I love my life. I was just a bit disorganized about my free time and still having to shift to get things done. All I want is 1 hour of complete silence which usually bring me to read sit and bedtime.
You see relaxation time is very important to me because I am on my feet waiting tables for sometimes 12 hour shifts. I use a pedometer and I walk 7 to 10 miles depending on how busy it is per shift. I was also riding a bike another 6 miles on top of that…lol. So when I get home I am exhausted both physcally and mentally after having 5 televisions blare at me all day and listening to patrons and employees bemoan their day, their game, their job, their relationship, their finances….and on and on. And I do it all with a smile and some vitamin H when needed, Hugs of course, vitamin H Everyone needs a dose….often. Yep we all remember Mark giving doses himself when we reached our kindness goal.
I have to make time for study and webinar replays and blog. but here I am week 18 a little behind maybe a lot behind but I am here and enjoying the fact that I have learned to make the time for the things I need to get done and the best part is I have learned not to beat myself up for being behind. I can only do what I can do in the time that I have. And yes there is a little wasted time in there that could be put to better use. But the important thing is I am still here I have not quit.
Sticking it out when you are falling behind is tough and I will admit that I had thought about quitting awhile back when I realized what a time crunch this course was going to be, but getting better organized freed up time and I pushed on and I continue to push on.
So week 18 Was, ( I know I am mixing tenses here but I am writing week 18 in week 21 so hang in there with me). absolutely fantastic! I got to meet one of my tribe members it was a wonderful experience I wish we were all closer in proximity but that’s what trains and planes are for,,,well maybe not the plane part so much. I’m good on a plane for about 3 hours I maybe be able to last 5. I really wanted to go to Kauai but when I went to get air fare… It was a 17 hour flight from south Florida 17 hours in a tin can 30000 ft in the air…..NO can do! Meet ya on the mainland!
Weeek 18 also brought me a car! Remember we were suposed to think of what we were pretending not to know?
Well the truth is I was pretending not to know just how much I need a car, It really hit home when my tribe mates were in Miami just 35 miles away and I couldn’t get there in a timely manner on my bike and trust me it is cheaper to rent a car than it is to Uber to Miami from FT Lauderdale. I love riding my bike and in some cases and times of the day it is faster than traveling by car simple because of the volume of traffic. But as my DMP is developing and the need for carrying equipment has become vital. Can’t carry a PA system on a bike.! Now that would truly be a miracle. then right out of the blue came this silver goddess at the right price, at the right place with the capacity to haul all my equipment right into my sphere of availability and now she is mine. I love my silver girl, and her name is silver bell and I call her Belle for short!…she is a bit vintage but as the universe has provided her for me, the universe will provide for me what I need for her.

week 17 Adventures in Organization and Movie Trailer Manifestation

So the virtue that is in the number 3 slot for me on the Franklin Makeover sheet is well organized. I feel I could use some improvement in this area. I consider myself to be fairly organized, but well organized to me seems to imply a bit more structure that I possess at the moment but something which I would like to gain. So as I walked through my week as the observer looking for signs of organization I found the yes I am a very organized person. Maybe I don’t know what to do with my free time but home, work and service have their appropriate time slots. Everything has to be done to allow for balance we must have time to eat, sleep, travel, rehearse, relax and time for studies. After all is said and done that gives me 14 hours of free time on Thursdays which right now includes catching up on Marco Polo’s and doing my Blog for now that is included in my relaxation….lol
So here in week 17 I find that my movie trailer in no longer just playing in my head. It is playing in my life in full color with music. it just jumped out of my mind and into my life a couple weeks ago.I have to admit that creating and using the movie trailer and the press release and the gal in the glass produced the most energy and manifested focus. I guess because I am in the entertainment industry these things felt close and comfortable after all I’m always seeing myself performing and who loves me better than I do?
So as I think about my movie trailer jumping into my life at the same time I came to a realization. I have always been tryinng to manifest my dream with the help of others ie. my band members. But the reality is that they have never shared my dream or even shared the same principles. You see I have always believed that if you work at something you love , the money will always come. but it is very hard for people that are so focused on what they need right now to believe that they can get what they want with a little faith.
I sent out and had delivered dozens of demos. I recorded them with love on my 16 track home studio and mixed them as best I could according to the manual, I’m not an audio engineer but I have a handle on working my equipment with the help of the manuals which I treat like gold. I bought the cd’s the jewel cases th cd lables and jewelcase inserts the ink, the paper for cover letters printed it all packaged it all up and tied it with a bow because that’s just who I amm I do everything with love, Because I believe.
I have always been into sharing so building a dream that includes other people was always comfortable for me, but because they did not believe in my vision and had no vision of their own; they always ended up going their seperate ways leaving me to wonder what I did wrong. Things didnt move fast enough. Because everyone wants to be instantly successful but no one wants to do the work it takes to get there
So the realization I came to that I believe caused my movie trailer to jump out of my head and into real life is I am doing this on my own. For the first time I have put my carreer into my hands to make and mold what ever I wish. And with that realization there it was before me. and the thought of being alone on stage was a bit scary and had me shaken for awhile, but once I made up my mind to let go of that fear. There it was!
It was a Saturday and I worked a double shift like always and I was tired it had been a busy day and I just want to get home get off my feet and soak in the tub. As I rode home I went past this club that is just around the corner from my house I noticed that the red open sign which is usually static was flashing as if it had a short in it, but it seemed to be calling my name. So I went in , I always carry two demo’s in my back pack just in case.
The managers were available so I gave them my demo with a small pitch about my vision.I remember they were pretty stone faced and I could really tell whether they were receptive or not but it was a very familiar face to me lately.
I went back a week later to follow up and to my surprise they were actually happy to see me and told me that they had listened to my demo and were giving me a Wednesday Night I was so excited I took the long way home.
I played my Wednesday night , had a good turn out and was offered a once a month engagement , help with promotion and a sound engineer. And then I realized, I m not alone The manager said that when I told him of my vision he could see it and see that I was serious about what I intended to do with the time he would allot me that he was willing to help me promote myself. So now I have a place to hang my banner. ‘WELCOME TO MY WORLD’

Week 16: Harmony

Week 16 was a steady flow of creative kindnesses and energy. When you are looking for kindness you will find it all around you, From the simple gesture of holding the door for someone or having it held for you. A kind good morning given or received brightens everyone’s day. For kindness week I observed 87 acts of kindness given and received. My acts of kindness included cleaning and stocking no matter who’s job it was to do those things and rounding up  some shopping carts and 1 discrete act of kindness by living a buck in a shopping cart that I was done with.
I consider my life to be bright, kind and harmonious and as written in scroll IV, I proclaim my uniqueness and strive not to follow the masses and settle for come what may. But I shall practice and improve and polish my words. I also seek constantly to improve my manners and graces as Ogg says they are the sugar to which all are attracted.
This weeks Masterkey 16 talks about the Law Of Periodicity The Law of Sevens

Eccesiastes 3 King James Version
3 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
2 A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
3 A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4 A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
5 A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
6 A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
7 A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
8 A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
As we can see the great truths have always been, and will forever be, so we just have to embrace their teachings.
Master keys tell us that if we are familiaar with these cycles that we will not be so shaken when things go wrong, instead we can use these lessons and our understanding of spiritual laws to make difficulties into blessings.
I had and experience this week which I think fits this senario perfectly. I had a vocal performance last wednesday. It was my first public solo performance in South Florida I had been looking forward to it for weeks and I wanted it to be perfect. So the first thing that happened was I got caught in the rain on the way to pick up my rental car. because it was raining I couldn’t roll down the windows to get fresh air and had to deal with the air system of the car that resulted in my head being all stuffed up with a runny nose and a scratchy throat…for a vocalist ..lol…not good… So I get to the venue it was still raining and I got rained on again and the spot lights they had to light the stage were nowhere near bright enough I had to hook up my equipment with the flashlight app on my phone and t it was so dark I was afraid that I might fall off the stage at any minute….lol our two sound systems did not interface well so it was louder in one part of the room than in another and it was hard to balance the sound…..I could have just started thinking negatively about the situation especially when my voice started to go luckily it wasn’t until the end of my performance that the benadryl wore off…lol but the fact is the situation was what it was and there wasn’t anything I could do about it because I had already done everything I knew to do. So all I could do was give a good performance. And in the end everyone was satisfied and had a good evening and my old blueprint would have started making excuses yo everyone for the performance and as much as I was tempted to apologize for the difficulties (my personal opinion), I felt that if everyone had had a good time then that was all that mattered. And that evening yielded a once a month engagement, with the promise of better lighting and a sound engineer. So my baby steps have taken me one step closer to self control which for me is #5 on my Franklin Makeover and one step closer to the realization of my DMP.
So what could have been thought of as a disaster turned out to be in my favor, I refused to think of that evening as anything other than a success and so it was.
Master key 16 goes on to tell us once more that thoughts are plastic matter that can be molded into form by means of mental images and clarity of thought this process being called Visualization. The means by which all human beings can transform their reality.
I know that I am on my way to creating the new reality I want for myself. I see it.

Week 15 Happy New Year! Moving forward, paths converge

I am natures greatest miracle. Og teaches us the we are all unique and rare in our own and no other can be exactly what we can be to the world. We all are of great value You know I really like the sound of that and it is something that I can believe with my whole being. What an achievemet it would be if man could put aside his differences and embrace each human being as the uniquely rare and valuable being they are. It will happen, maybe not in my life time, but then again, who knows how long my lifetime may be!….lol

As week 15 coincides with the New year I would like to share poem IV from The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyamm with Spiritual Interpretation and Practical Application as written by Paramahansa Yogananda founder of the Self Realization Fellowship.

Now the New Year reviving old desires.
The thoughtful Soul to Solitude retires
Where the White Hand of Moses on the Bough
Puts out, and Jesus from the Ground suspires.

GLOSSARY: New Year: New dawn of wisdom, Old desires : The age old longing of the soul in quest of Spirit. The thoughtful soul: The soul that reasons and discriminates* Solitude: The inner silence of spiritual consciousness. White Hand: Purified consciousness. Bough: Universal wisdom: Christ Consciousness. Ground: The cosmic delusion of mortality.

*strictly speaking the soul, being a pure reflection of the spirit, is all knowing and has no need to reason or discriminate. But during incarnation, ( Our present condition on earth )the soul takes on the delusion of separation from the Spirit. as wisdom begins to dawn in man through the natural upward evolution of his reason and discrimination, the soul’s all knowing faculty of intuition stirs and directs these powers within, to discover intuitively the eternal presence of the spirit.

Practical Application

When wisdom dawns on you , awakening the desire to understand the mystery of your soul, don’t put it off: retire to the inner sanctum sanctotum of silent peace wherein all great souls have entered, by the gate of meditation, and found wisdom and emancipation.
The thirst for understanding can be quenched only by drinking new wisdom daily from the well of discrimination. The burning desire of incarnations are alleviated only by soothing dews of peace, collected in the deep bowl of solitude. Moses, Jesus, you and I, all beings, can find ever-sought for solace in the silence of the soul.
This quatrain has also mundane significance. The advent of the New Year revives old desires to succeed on the path of life. Most individuals fail to garner the rare wild blossoms of success because they do not deeply deliberate and search long enough to discover where they lie hidden on the forest of difficulties.
Everyone who seeks success, even as great men have sought it and found fulfillment, should retire often into the silence and introspect on his problems. By discrimination and meditation he can make his mind receptive to the intuitive guidance of the soul and plan his life accordingly. Problems that have seemed insoluble will unravel their mysteries in the nook of solitary thhoughtfulness.

Paramahansa Yogananda

Happpy New Year Seems these same principles are what we are being taught here with the MKEMMA


Week 14 Some days are just easier than others

Week 14:
Well I made it through Christmas. The day after, not so much….Day 2 of of yet another 7 day mental diet. I really thought that I would get through the holiday season without a hitch but my daughter had other plans. Some times it seems like your family can’t stand to see you actually happy. going through life speaking no ill, having a smile and keeping your mouth shut….lol
That seems to trigger the reaction from them to see exactly what it will take to get under your skin. I decided not to play that game.I just left! Oh yes I was told I was just running away. Hell yeah I was leaving because what was the point of arguing about some old crap that doesn’t matter. Have you ever really noticed that most arguments are about trivial things? Sometime with family I want to say if you want to argue about something , lets pick a topic of importance and see if we can actually solve a problem. but..I get out to the garage I reach into my back pack, grab my cards and all is well because in my hands I hold the essence of the good and simple things I have done in my life. I flip through and I feel good about myself and I don’t have to give another thought to what has just transpired. Pop in my ear buds, listen to the Masterkey Audio and I am ready for my ride home. Oh yeah don’t worry about me not being able to hear traffic….I have a smart phone and apparently it decides what volume I can listen at. and I’m on a bike.

So the movie that I watched was Cool Runnings, because it was certainly the most fun and it was the only one I could find on Netflix. It is about a young sprinter named Derice Bannock who’s father was a gold medal Olympian, and his dream was to follow in his fathers foot steps and become a gold medal winner himself. His Definite Major Purpose. He loses his chance to go to the Olympics as part of the Jamaican Sprint Team due to another runner stumbling and falling. But that is not the end of it, he is a man with a dream and he will persist until he succeeds.
After finding that there was only 1 Olympic event that could utilize his talent and speed, he decides to form the first Jamaican Bobsled Team! because he is not going to let his dream die because of one little set back, He uses his positive mental attitude to formulate a specific plan of action to get him to the Olympics as a bobsledder. It just so happens that there is an American Bobsled gold metal winner living on the Island Irving Blitzer who first came up with the idea of sprinters pushing off bobsleighs. They need to enlist his help as coach, but he wants nothing to do with the idea at first, but then views it as a way to get back into the good graces of the Olympic committee, as he was caught cheating in the 1972 Olympics.
Derice and his best friend Sanka Coffee, the champion push cart driver on the Island have to be quite persistent in their attempts to get Irving Blitzer to commit to being their coach but finally it’s a done deal. But they had to work for it. But they still need a team a 4 man team. As luck would have it the other two sprinters involved in the fall, Junior Bevil and Yule Brenner also share similar DMP’s and want to go to the Olympics anyway they can, so together , 3 sprinters and a pushcart driver become the first Jamaican bobsled team. and with their coach they are their own Master Mind Alliance
Once they get to Calgary the true growth begins, they find that not everyone is excited about the prospect of a Jamaican Bobsled team. They discover nobody real wants them there. They have to endure insults from other bobsled teams, But with their positive attitudes and their persistence, after being disqualified and then reinstated and Junior’s father showing up to take him home, and losing a blade on their sled on their final run causing them to lose any hope of winning a gold medal. The Jamaican team picked up their sled proudly and walked it across the finish line winning the hearts of the world and making history thus achieving everything they actually wanted to do.

This Movie serves as an inspiration to everyone who has a dream that if they hold that dream in their minds with a positive mental attitude and persistently follow a plan of action, using the help of their own personal Mastermind Alliance all dreams can be realized.

Week: 13 Emerging from my Chrysalis MY wings are exposed!

And my soul shall FLY!
Boom the most powerful webinar yet!, it home and awakened my senses. I actually thought that I was struggling but I realize that I am right on track with my studies. My struggle has been with catching up on my Marco Polo’s. Simply because I get the webinar in replay so I can’t really discuss a webinar until I have viewed it. It would be like trying to have a conversation about something you know nothing about…..lol   I’m not in that habit…lol

So what have I actually learned in 13 weeks?

I learned that I and I alone am the master architect of my life. And only I can build a new reality for myself. I learned that thoughts are energy and causes and that everything that manifest in my life, good or bad, is the direct effect of  my thoughts and the energy put into them.. I am the cause , my life is the effect. I learned that in order to build that new reality that I need a new blue print that is  concise and uses specific language for my subconscious to interpret to  begin construction. This is done by means of a DMP. Definite Major Purpose. Here is where I had a little problem.  I never knew what I wanted to be when I grew up.  I was a human being, I wanted to experience life and evolve. That got shot down early on when I realized that people were more into slapping a label on themselves and throwing themselves into a box because it was easier that taking the responsibility of being human. And thus we have the world today! And this is in keeping with my PPN Personal Pivotal Need of Spiritual Growth. And as my DMP manifest it brings the satisfaction of my PPN Recognition For Creative Expression. Although  I do believe that my PPN’s are in perfect alignment to each other,  as I write this I may have to rethink my DMP. Because to me becoming as perfect a human being as possible is a much loftier ambition than becoming a notable singer, but I do love to sing! My consciousness has shifted  me back to where I belong,  grounded in the spiritual.   Yey, MKE
I learned that I talk too much and too fast to be a good guardian at the gate….Anyone who has ever talked to me knows that …lol  but I am trying.
I learned that I could use colors and shapes and highly charged emotion to transfer my thoughts from mundane energy to the dynamic energy in order to create a fully charged visualization of my new life and hold and inspect it and continue to build on it til it is a perfect creation ready for manifestation.
I learned to accept being a gracious giver and a grateful receiver because giving is the only way to open the channel between the material and the divine to allow our perfect creation to manifest . And you can not receive unless your heart is open to it.  And being open means trust.
I learned that my life is full and rich, maybe not by someone else’s standards but certainly by mine because it is full of life,, laughter  and love. And you can always find me dispensing vitamin H…that’s hugs!  And I learned to identify some of my triggers to negative thought formulation and substitute a positive affirmation to dissipate the negative energy. This requires a lot of work on my part,  remember not to good of a guardian at the gate…lol But what is life without challenges?….lol  Good on theory but a little light on practical application …but I get it!
I learned to look myself in the eye in the mirror  for 50 minutes while reciting a one sentence DMP  and fully love and appreciate the person looking back. In my 50 minutes I experienced having to face what my fear of accomplishment actually is and deal with it. Although I may be flawed at this moment in time, the person looking back is perfection.

But the most important thing I have learned from this experience is that I am in the presence of other human beings who are trying to make this world a better place for all. And I am truly humbled to be in your presence. Thank you for the experience. I would like to share with you what has been my blue print for my life. I found a copy in a thrift shop when I was about 20. I had ventured off to college and had found that my parents had kept us children extremely sheltered from harshness of the “REAL” world. I was at a loss as how not to be totally emotionally crushed by the pure nonsense and cruelty of it all. And then I found this. It became my blueprint for my life.


Go Placidly amid the the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quitely and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself to others you will become vain and bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your acheivements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own carreer, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to the virtue there is. many people strive for high ideals: and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be Yourself. Especially do not feigh affection. Neither be cynical about love: for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perenial as the grass. Take kindly to the counsel of years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to sheild you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself, you are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars you have a right to be here, and weather or not it is clear to you no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with GOD whatever you conceive Him to be: and whatever your labors and aspirations, in this noisy confusion of life, keep pace with your soul. With all it’s sham and drudgery and broken dreams it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. Max Ehrman

“The Father and I are one Increase in me that wisdom Which discovers my truest interest, Strengthen my resolution To perform that which wisdom dictates.
I look forward to my next 13 weeks and continuing my evolution.

Week 12: It’s getting to the point… where I’m……

Well here we are, and here I am. I am whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious and happy….To be a human being and loving every moment of it.
Week 12 finds me totally embracing my 50 minutes of me! Wow! At first it was pretty weird mostly because I don’t think I have ever looked at my self in the eye for 50 minutes straight before! So of course i went through the shadows under my eyes becoming big bags and my face becoming a bit distorted as I stared myself down my future self while looking at my shapes and actually it was kinda awesome because I could laugh at my face until I saw me again…lol
When I incorporated the brain gymnastics, things got a bit more fun it was easier to recite after I had boiled my DMP down to  my one line DMP the ultimate goal,  because I developed a rhythm It was actually like playing my body as a drum. I looked a bit silly in the mirror and I started to laugh and that brought out the smiles and the giggles and the enthusiasm. which mad it even more fun. I did have a bit of a time trying to come up with 30 things I did right.  At first it seemed a bit egotistical but it became fun when I realized that I had done some things right in my life….lol  After that I was merrily tooting my own horn on some multi colored 3 x 5 cards.

Feeling better all the time!





Week 10 and 11: A funny thing happened on the way to my Goal!

Yeah I had to combine these two because what happened , happened over the course of two weeks. I really had to give this a lot of thought. The past weeks 8 and 9 I have been giggling to myself about how well my POA had been going and seeing small manifestations of good fortune for me and others.
I was noticing that I was not seen the same people that I had given money to or paid their bus fare and I usually saw the same people at least twice a week, but it is the Holiday Season! I hope everyone is safe and prosperous.
I had actually completed 7 days on my 7 day diet without any recollection of a negative thought being entertained by subby. Yes a thoughts would try to enter the gates but they were summarily dismissed by the watchman. And yes I was feeling quite proud of my self, confident, secure in the knowledge that ” I can be what I will to be.” and I will to be a more conscious and confident human being.

Then slam back to Day 1 with a kicker!
I have my weekend routine up at 4 am get ready to roll, feed Clementine, out the door at 5 am stop at Walgreens for hydration, or whatever I might need when I get to work at 5:30 am
But this particular Sunday was different I walked in with my earbuds in listening to the Master keys audio and headed for the cooler in the back because I was thinking that an Arizona Tea  would go really well with the masterkeys  and was going to taste awfully good right then;  when I realized there was a new girl at the counter and she was speaking to me so I pulled out my ear bub and apologized for not hearing her when she told me that I needed to leave my backpack at the front counter. Well there you have it…I wish I could say that I just said ok and left it and went and grabbed my drink but nooooooooo instead I said I have been coming in here every day for  three years and I have never had to leave my backpack and I am not leaving it today. And I said it quite emphatically and I left.
Now here is where we have to pay strict attention to the goings on here. There was actually a very good reason why I did not want to leave my back pack and that is because on the weekends I am the bank. I carry extra cash to be able to change the $50′s and $100′s that are going to be wanting to be changed through out the day on the course and in the Restaurant.
So naturally I don’t want give up my back pack, but I was taken by surprise and I didn’t handle the situation properly and put undue strength and emotion into my words and this is what happen. And my mistake I went over this in my mind as a justification and oh boy ,it took more than 7 seconds ….lol
That negative thought wized on past the stunned watchman at the gate and made a B-line for subby who in turn tossed it around to  those 40,000,000 peptides that were now standing at attention just waiting to create  by the justification,  What I will call a money suck….lol
For the past few days no matter how much I know I have in my wallet when I go to spend it it’s not all there, sometimes none of it it there….lol
So today after having this happen for the third time I had to laugh because I realize that I created this myself a negative cash flow because let my concentration lasp and subby decided that I wanted it to manifest loss from my unexpressed fear of losing money which I gave dynamic thought by accident.
So I have forgiven myself and promise to be ever watchful for those little situations created to… throw you off guard…test you…. if you will or….Just give you a slap back when you are getting to to big for your britches.

So at week 11 I know I have the power to create the life I want. I just have to be more conscientious about not being reactionary when someone upsets my peace of mind.

I’m trying,  but it’s hard